romankyaryday:

i went to a new school when i started second grade and i still remember what my parents said to me as they dropped me off on my first day at the new school: “dont do your yoshi impression, it’s weird and you’ll make no friends.”

(via gnarly)

alphabitches:

My cousin came out to his mum by baking a cookie and writing “GAY” on it with icing and then went up to her and said “you are what you eat” then he ate the motherfucking cookie and if that’s not the best way to come out idk what is

(Source: alphabitches, via gnarly)

oli-twist:

windspray:

how do i get a flat stomach by tomorrow

image

(via gnarly)

me and bae having sex

bae: mmm yeah fuck me baby

me: put a quarter in the swear jar